Everyone has their own way of getting over someone. Many women I have met are super strong. They make a decision and never look back - they are done. There are others that pine over the person until they are sick and are pretty much on their way to stalkerville. It might take a court order for them to realize it's over and there is no getting around it. Then there is me. I "FEEL" everything from sadness, to joy, to desperately missing, to anger and pain...ALL OF IT!!! I will retreat into my shell for some time and go over and over everything, the good the bad and the ugly. I will talk to countless friends to get their opinion about what I should do. Even though I know ALL of their answers will be the same, I still ask. I'm not sure if this helps or not, but I'm sure my talking about it over and over must drive them insane. Actually, now that I think of it...they must really be great friends just to put up with that bullshit! :-) I think when it boils down to it, they just want to see me happy. And I truly want to be happy too. But getting there is what takes what seems like FOREVER.
So what can I do to make these feelings go away and get to happy? Try to remember how I got to this place, maybe. Come to terms with why I feel so jilted and why I need to move on. Stop, stop, stop remembering the good times. Try to put them in the back of my mind for now. And start keeping in mind the reasons why I need to get out of this relationship. Ugh, ok...here we go. Let's start from the beginning:
1. Hmm, you cheated on me
2. You went on a fucking cruise with another woman and lied about it
3. You would get angry with me for no apparent reason and not talk to me for days/weeks at a time
4. You stiffeled my personality to the point where I was not myself
5. You drink too much
6. You seem to think that buying me things is a way of showing affection
7. I am always last on your list
8. You are insecure and jealous which is interesting considering #1
9. You refuse to be close to my family or allow me to be close to yours
10. You are extremely materialistic
11. You don't like skiing, golfing, nature, sunshine, dancing, to be romantic, my friends, my family, trying new things
12. You know that I want to get married and have a family, yet you do not share that desire
13. You seem to think it's ok for you to talk to all the women you want to, but if I do it, I'm cheating on you
14. You are all about you and your needs
15. You are not proud of me
16. You never get excited over things that I am excited about
17. You have attacked my integrity and my character
18. You have allowed your friends to do the same
19. As many times as I backed you up - even if you were wrong, you have never done the same for me
20. You can't say I love you unless you are drunk
21. You completely ignore my feelings
22. Hmm, you're an asshole
23. You couldn't even pick up YOUR birthday gift from my parents
24. You have a track record for hurting women that care for you
25. You use your family as a cover for lies you tell
26. You took back gifts you gave me
27. You always talk about "all the things you have done for me" but never ever acknowledge all that I have done for you...and somehow I manage to give these things without putting it back in your face as you have with me
28. I feel like I have wasted the last 4 years of my life, love and heart on a man that didn't give a damn about me
29. You broke my heart
30. You pretended to be my friend, but you are no friend
31. You betrayed your own best friend to cover for another
32. I don't think people really like you
33. You don't know how to be in social settings
34. You have never fought for me like I have for you
35. You are controlling and domineering
36. You don't respect women
37. You have double standards
38. You don't know how to love anyone
39. You are not trustworthy
40. You look at marriage in a very negative light
I'll write more as I come up with them. This makes me feel a little better...
